Working Mothers Redefining Success

MSNBC.COM recently ran a great article aggregating several new studies and research statistics about the changing roles of mothers in the workplace. Eve Tahhimcioglu's article cites new studies showing that women now make up the majority of the workforce (51%, but still...), are delaying starting families, are better educated and are, in short, redefining the rules of success.

I recall my first performance review cycle after returning to work following the birth of my twin boys. It was "fine," you know- meets expectations consistently with a few exceeds expectations in there- but I'm not just "fine." Doggone it, I'm a rock star! How could I be just average? Well, I'll tell you how. Because 2 or 3 nights a week I was up several time nebulizing an infant with an inflamed respiratory tract, I had to leave at 5pm to make daycare pick up and frequently missed work for sick kids. Why couldn't they couldn't get sick at the same time, but rather, one after the other?

My husband has always been an equal partner and in fact during that time period he took the morning shift (including daycare drop off), split sick days and was a frequent flier at the Pediatrician's office. But what that review cycle told me was that I wasn't superhuman, I was not the same employee I was before I had kids, I had (significant!) external factors that limited my ability to go above and beyond.

With the help of a dear friend, who returned to work after having twins the same day I did, we sat down and drafted "New Goals for Success." They're outdated, company- and industry-specific, but the gist of it was we could not judge ourselves against our child-free co-workers. It was just apples and oranges. All we could do was our level best day in, day out, and then get home to our families.

I urge each of you to think about redefining what success means to you. Does it mean the proverbial corner office? A "C" in your title? Well good on ya, you have my vote ! But for you it might mean being off every other Friday to volunteer in your daughter's classroom, or home by 6pm on Mondays to lead cub scouts, or the ability to work from home when your little one is sick. There are tradeoffs for each of these, no doubt, but if they're your goals, you won't feel like you're missing a thing.

When the Job Search Drags On

A job search in this market, particularly one that involves competitive rates, flexibility and the right location, can be quite time consuming. It's important to focus your limited time on the best next steps.

First, do you want to do something different or do you want to continue what you’re doing, albeit in a more flexible manner? If it's the former, you've got your work cut out for you. Career transitions are tough in this very crowded market. Focus on in-demand industries and identify your most highly desirable skill sets.

If the latter, what companies do you want to work for? Who's hiring for your skills and in your area? Which of those companies show up on Working Mother's Top 100 list for flexibility? Who in your peer group raves about their flexibility, where do they work? In short, you need to develop a target list and drill down.

On that target list, who do you know in each organization? Reach out to your own network via phone, email and offer to take folks out for a coffee. It's 20 minutes and $5, the best use of your time (captive audience!) Use the Search Function in LinkedIn.com to find people in your network (or your network's network) at (or formerly with) those companies. Check out our LinkedIn Job Search Tips. Make a spreadsheet, track your correspondence, be overly thankful for assistance and time.

This is absolutely a partnership and a process, we're happy to help along the way, even if that means you don't land a position with one of our clients.